What do you do, when someone is telling lies about you….

Hope this can help.

Romy Ras Certified Life Coach

Today I was asking God: what do you want me to write about today? The entire day nothing came up, until now.

Let me take this back a little and share something with you. For the past couple of days I have been praying and asking God to change me. God teach me how to be humble, quiet, gentle and give me your peace that surpasses all understanding….. OOH – And God let me see myself from your eyes – WELL!!! Today was my test, here is my story.

Someone approached me and asked me about a lie somebody is spreading about me. I could not believe my ears, how could this person spread such a big lie about me? They don’t even know me – if they would know me they would understand that the lie they are spreading does not fit my profile……… And I went on about…

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The Good Side!

I woke up early today, excited over all I get to do before the clock strikes midnight.
I have responsibilities to fulfil today.I am important. My job is to choose what kind of day
I am going to have. Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or..


Be happy. just because things are not good, doesn’t mean you can’t see the good side of things.

I can be thank ful that the grass is

getting watered for free.

Today I can mourn my lack of friends or..

I can excitedly embark upon a quest to

discover new relationships.

Today  I can grumble about my health or..

I can rejoice that I am alive.

Today I can feel sad that I don’t have more money


I can be glad that my finances encourage me to

plan my purchases wisely and guide me away from


Today I can lament over all that my parents didn’t

give me when I was growing up or..

I can celebrate that they allowed me to be born.

Today  I can cry because roses have thorns or..

I can celebrate that thorns have roses.

Today I can whine because I have to go work or..

I can shout for joy because I have a job to do.

Today I can complain because I have to go to school


I can eagerly open mind and fill it with new rich

titbits of knowledge.

Today  I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do

housework or..

I can feel honoured because the lord has provided

shelter for my mind, body, and soul.

Today strecthes ahead of me, waiting to be shaped.

And here I am, the sculptor

who gets to do the shaping.

What  today will be like is up to me.

I get to choose what kind

of day I will have!

Have a great day … unless you have other plans.

Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.

Stop when you have enough.

Be royal.

Never pretend to be something you’re not.

If what you want lies buried,

dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day

be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.
That’s the good side!

How I live.

From Google.

I look down into people’s eye as if everyday is looking at me

I ask a question but no one answers it,

I  make jokes but no one laughs,

I try to make friends but the most trusted ones are too busy,

I want to play but people run away from me,

When I work hard, everyone is happy,

When I make a mistake, everyone is concerned,

When I ask for corrections, no one is ready to help me,

When I make a decision no one takes it,

When I am happy, everyone is unhappy,

When I am selfish, everyone tells me to serve

When I am in unhappy, everyone tells me to be happy,

When I am efficient, no one appreciates it,

When I am in efficient, I am humiliated,

When I plan for happiness, I am offended,

When I feel I should be alone, I get companions,

When I plan to stay awake, I am bored,

There I am confused but I make them a part of my life and

use them to achieve my goals.

Do you know your body?

That 50,000 of the cells in your body will die and replace with new cells, all while you have been reading the sentence.

From Google.

That the tooth is the only part of the human body that can not repair itself.

That the average human body contains enough sulphur to kill all fleas on an average dog.

That the average human body contains enough carbon to make 900 pencils.

That the human body contains enough fat to make seven bars of soap.

That the average human body contains enough phosphorous to make 220 match heads.

That an average human body contains enough water to fill a 38 liter tank.

That an average human body contains enough potassium to fire a toy cannon.

Red blood cells make approximately 250,000 trips around the body before returning to the bone marrow where they where born to die.

That an adult at rest usually takes in and breathes out 6 litres of air each minute.

That some acacia species have a nauseating liquid that drives animals away expect giraffes.

That giraffes have an extraordinary tongue for obtaining acacia leaves. The tounge, 90 cm long can maneuver around the throns to get the delicacy, the leaves.

The world’s first test tube twins were born in June 1981.

Every human being spent about half an hour as a single cell.

Protozoa are clear. They can take the colour of materials inside them includind food they have just eaten.

You can

If you think that you are beaten, you are

If you think you dare not, you don’t

If you like to win but think you can not

It is certain that you won’t


If you think that you will lose, you have lost

For out of the world we find that

Success begins with a fellow’s will

It’s all in the same state of mind


If you think that you are outclassed, you are

You have got to think high to rise

You have got to be sure of yourself

Before you reach the ultimate prize


Life’s battles don’t always go

To the stronger or faster man

But sooner or later the man

Is the one who thinks he can

And if you think that you can then you certainly know

how it’s done.



Stop with the excuses!

It’s always somebody else’s fault. Of course it is. The unhappiness, debt and the general lack of progress I am currently experiencing is someone else’s fault. You see my parents set me up to fail. And then there are the no-good friends who hang around me. How can one expect to prosper with such a crowd? As for the woman I married, hmmn, she is singlehandedly bringing me to ruin.

Ever heard about the boss from hell? Well, I’m working for him and he’s determined to make sure I don’t get promoted. The there’s the government and all its corrupt leaders that are bleeding this country and me with it, dry. As for my children, they are gifted, bright and well-mannered. It’s the other children from the neighbourhood who are corrupting them. Introducing them to drugs, partying and insolent behaviour. Junior would never have been suspended from school if it wasn’t for that dastardly Jimmy. As for their teachers?

Is this an all too familiar soundtrack to your life? To mine? Truth be told, blaming other people for the way our life is turning out is something we are all guilty of from time to time. However, it is not a productive exercise because we have little to no control over how other people act.



At some point we have to grow up, look in the mirror, take responsibility and realise, “It’s not them, it’s me.” Sure you may have been dealt a crazy deck of cards but it’s up to you to change the narrative; to take charge of how you play so that you get your best possible result in the circumstances.

Your parents may not have given you the education you wanted but thousands of people enrolled in evening classes are changing that particular narrative everyday. Everyday people get out of debt, change jobs, improve their parenting skills and find happiness. People like you and me change their lives for the better everyday. In the same vein, people like you and me stay in their self-made ruts everyday.

Taking personal responsibility is not to say that people won’t do us wrong, that other people do not deserve any blame for the bad they have done to us. It is to say that we get to choose our response to their terrible actions. Unless we are under 18, we are not entirely powerless. Will we allow their wrong doing to keep us down, or will we rise, slowly and surely above it?

However, it is probably just as bad to admit our wrongdoing and then stick in a cycle of woefully blaming ourselves. Everything is our fault, from our looks to our lack of intelligence to our poor social skills. “There’s something wrong with me. That’s why no-one loves me,” a young woman may believe, and that misguided self-blame becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

When we take a healthier, more balanced approach, we can admit that we occasionally mess up and hopefully find ways to learn from our mistakes.

If you don’t like the way your life is, change it. But for that to happen you have to get rid of other people blame.

Social networking addicition

Facebook, LinkedIn, Myspace, Twitter, Digg, StumbleUpon, Friendster, Tumblr, Xanga. the list goes on and on. And if you are any sort of tech savvy, there is good chance you are a member of multiple social networks. Even I have accounts with at least 4 of these. While there is a lot to be gained by using these services, there is a lot to be lost.

In case you hadn’t heard, Facebook users share not only a social network of over 500 million, but also significantly lower grade point averages (GPAs) than their non-member classmates (according to Time Magazine). And apparently Jennifer Aniston ended her relationship with John Mayer because he was addicted to Twitter (as opposed to drugs like other musicians). This begs the question, how many of us are addicted to social networks, and what can we do about it?

You may think, “I’m not addicted, I can quit anytime!” Well if you have more Facebook friends than real friends, something must be done. If you spend more time working on your LinkedIn profile than doing actual work, it’s time for an intervention. Regardless of your excuse, this is not ok.

Here are a few tips that can help you monitor your social network use, and ensure that you are being productive instead of wasting time.

  1. Track Your Time Online – The simplest way to ensure you aren’t wasting time in any one place is to monitor your time. Use a stopwatch and set a limit. When time is up, log out regardless of what’s left. There is always tomorrow.
  2. Remember the Telephone – I know, it’s so primitive. But a call to a friend works just as well as a Facebook message, and its real human interaction, something we are losing touch with.
  3. Go Outside – get away from your portal to the network. Get some sunshine, chances are you need it.
  4. Limit your Memberships – There is no need for memberships to 10 different networks. In fact, there is no need for even 2 memberships of sites which do the same thing. Choose Facebook or Myspace, but not Digg, or StumbleUpon. This will probably cut your memberships in half, and hopefully cut the time spent on them down also.
  5. Use Your Networks Productively – When I first used Twitter I followed thousands of followers. Strangely though, people rarely responded to my tweets, and it was like I was invisible. I decided I’d only use twitter if I could be productive with it, so I unfollowed thousands of users (now below 1000), and use Twitter only to share and interact with people with similar interests as mine. Now my Twitter is a tool, not a time warp.
  6. Prioritize – Use these tools only when your work has been done, or during down time. Don’t spend time updating your profile or changing your pic when there is work to be done. This will not only save you time and increase productivity, but will build self-discipline as well.
  7. Stop Procrastinating – Many times we get on Facebook or twitter when we have real work that we just don’t want to do. Stop that! Get the work done. Once you finish you’ll have the time in the world to spend making friends on Facebook.
  8. Remove the Cell Phone Apps – You don’t really need Facebook or Twitter on your phone. Nothing on there can be that important. Save your social networking for when you are behind the desk and limit the distractions throughout the day.
  9. Spend More Time with Close Friends and Family – You aren’t the only one who suffers when you spend countless hours on Myspace. Your family and friends don’t see you, because you are too busy learning how to customize you backgrounds and take crazy pictures from all different angles for your profile pic. Cut out the cancer and get back to friends and family.

It’s time to take back your free time. Remember that these sites are built to make money, not increase your productivity. Nobody is looking out for you expect you (and me…). Follow my tips and live life in the real world instead of the e-world. Trust me, it’s more fun this way.